MELORA through Joanna Neff


SOUL-RETRIEVAL Exercises, continued

[Some channeling is missing because of turning the cassette tape over.]

. . . energetically, vocally, whatever. And again, you don't have to do them all at once. You can just take one at a time--your prominent guide, the example that we introduced you to, in the past couple weeks, all right?

J: Thank you.

There is one facing you from a past life, a male, dark. Are you aware of this presence? Almost nose-to-nose with you and having an influence on you in this life.

J: . . . energetically I can feel it. It seems to be a source of some type of anxiety.

Kind of a smothering feeling?

J: Mm-Hm.

All right. So call in your guide to be present with you. And listen internally to what he says, and if this is too private, you needn't share. But if you feel like sharing it, that's fine too. (Long silence.)

J: It has to do with an aspect of my being that I had disassociated with (Melora agrees) and had not been accepting of. And that is the thing that causes this sense of anxiety that doesn't really have anything to do with me. You know the story or the drama that goes on with that that was created as a result of that . . .

A splinter personality.

J: Right. So, I guess just an opportunity for me to have knowledge of a very powerful presence that I react to with a certain amount of fear and trepidation, so it's just a powerful thing for me to own that and acknowledge it . . .

We have heard the term "shadow self"--almost like what they term the darker self, is that so? At least in your perception.

J: Right. Something that I've judged as being bad. Almost like an overpowering or kind of overbearing energy. So I'm just feeling like . . . my guide is saying to me that it's just this opportunity to just forgive that and be accepting of that and let go of my judgment of that, and just let that re-emerge in my being.

All right. We would suggest that you ask that in the form of a prayer petition now. Your requestingit's a prayer request to have help in this process, and before the end of the weekend this will be resolved. But we are being told not to rush in and take care of this for you now. We are being asked to wait until we do the one-on-one soul retrieval before the workshop closes. That it is necessary for you to ponder this event. We assure you it is not going to haunt you, or cause you undue discomfort, but that part of the process of coming into harmony with this will be between now and the end of the workshop.

Pondering this [and we are not without mercy (laughter) in these processes], the first clue that we got is perhaps to look at this splinter self in the same way that we have described that according to the various filters that certain channels have. An Ascended Being will take on certain colors, will take on certain personality traits, and the Guide as expressed through you is a much softer energy than he might be, coming through another channel. This is the same as looking at the splinter self so that our first clue was: If you could look at this splinter self transform into the Guide that you know, this would be a great help in calibrating or resonating you to that splinter fragment, where you allow it the possibility of being expressed in that way that you know and are so comfortable with. Do you see?

It's like turning a coin over. It's like any trait has a positive expression of that trait and/or what you judge to be the negative trait, so the ingredients of stubbornness give you the ability to be loyal. One is judged as positive and the other is judged as negative, do you see? So if you tried to annihilate your own stubbornness, you'd throw the baby out with the bath water, because the loyalty goes as well.

And so it is with the splinter self. It looks to you like the negative side of the coin, and if you turn it, you'll see its true expression to be more like your Guide, and as old issues of fearing abuse of power, also karmic issues of fearing abuse of power. So there has been a very heightened femininity because the belief structure here is that this will keep that in check. There will be no chance for abuse of power (laughs) when the ultra-femininity is enhanced, do you see? It's only a perception that if you come into balance with the male, dynamic aspect of yourself you will lose the control that keeps your use of power in check. Does this make sense?

J: Yes. Let me ask you a question, Melora, speaking of this.

We believe in striking while the iron is hot (laughs).

J: And let's go the one earlier, with part of K's question too. When you're actually experiencing this fear or this anxiety in your body, intellectually we know to re-focus our energy on something else and not resist it, and the analogy that comes up for me about that is undergoing natural childbirth. I can remember when I was in childbirth telling myself, "You don't have to perceive this pain as pain. You can perceive it as just pressure, and opening, and going through all this technique to try to convince your body that you don't have to perceive this as pain." And this thing about fear is the same thing. When you're in process of it, what is the technique you can use to . . . we know to re-focus, but how do you do that when you're actually confronted in the process of that fear?

The pain always comes from resistance--always. And so one needs to be forgiving of the body resisting feeling the pain. And in a situation such as you described, in childbirth, acknowledging pain as pain first is what we would recommend, rather than jumping to re-focusing. So acknowledging and honoring first the reality of the sensation of pain first--then making a choice to reinterpret--but not as a way of blocking, not as a way of going into denial. There is a difference between blocking and denial, and choosing to re-focus as you described, on sensation.

For example, the fastest way to make fear shrink is to stand up to it. The fastest way to make it grow is to give it energy by continuing to be fearful. Facing fear means saying, "I'm really afraid!" instead of feeling the emotion of fear, and then going into denial, or whistling a happy tune. You know that song . . . (sings): Whenever I feel afraid, I hold my head erect." Do you remember that one? All right. So that's a kind of denial. That's a behavior modification that may make you feel less afraid for the moment, but it doesn't actually do anything to change the source of the fear.

Yes, maybe if you change the subject you won't feed it and it won't get bigger, but it doesn't get any smaller either. So with anything that you feel repelled by or that you feel anxiety about, actually the more you face it and acknowledge it and say, "You're darn ed right I'm scared!" (laughs) Or, You're darned right I'm angry," or whatever it is. When you acknowledge it, it actually diminishes. And that's why when you express it, it diminishes. When you block it and deny it, it comes in; it's held in.

In some people it turns into disease as you know. In other people it turns into mental problems. So with this shadow self, for example, or with setting goals that seem very scary, the desirable thing is to say, "I'm really afraid. This is really scary!" Or "I recognize this shadow self that I've been going into denial about or blocking over actually a long period of time." Iis that not so? "And now I'm gonna just take a really good look at it and say, 'You know? I'm really afraid of you, and this is why.'"

And this is the pondering that we were describing, J., between now and the last part of the workshop tomorrow--the pondering, where you look it right in the face and you say, "Here's what I think, and this is why I feel so alienated. This is why I am not interested in talking to you, or why I keep running away from you." State those things, and you will watch the negativity become altered. You will see the shrinking of the enormity of this thing that makes you feel the anxiety, J. Do you understand?

J: Thank you.

It is our pleasure. Give us a moment [to R.]. The image we just got is that parts of you move forward like a slinky, and then the rest of them come forward. So it's not like all of you moves forward at the same time. Do you have any idea why we are getting this image?

R: Because it's accurate! (laughter)

What we're seeing is that maybe one of your higher bodies (or maybe your emotional body) comes up, and then your mental body and then your physical body are still here, so it's like three images. Like time-lapse. And then this one catches up with them. Like a slinky. And then these move up . . . or like a caterpillar. Do you see what we're saying? This is what we're seeing with you. So could you describe that to us, what that dynamic is?

R: What it feels like?

What, in your experience, makes that resonate with you?

R: Well, this morning we were talking about discomfort--focusing on discomfort and not moving ahead. I seem to resonate with that because I feel like I start to move ahead and then I feel discomfort and I stay there. I think: What's wrong? There must be something wrong. I have to look here and then I have to look here and I have to look hereeverything I turn over doesn't quite fit what feels "wrong." So I feel like I'm stuck.

Well, we would suggest that this is the very reason why committees are formed, why people have meetings. We would suggest that you need to have a meeting with these several aspects of you so that you can come into alignment, because some of them are jumping ahead and making decisions, and the rest are saying, "Wait a minute! We're not coming along until we have this all scoped out."

It would be an interesting exercise for you to figure out how you can meet with them or in what way that process would be beneficial or efficient for you. In order to do that you need to identify which one (or ones) are jumping ahead first and then decide how you may want to bring the other ones forward. Maybe habitually the mental one jumps forward first and then the emotional one is hanging back a little bit, or whatever, and maybe the emotional body needs to come forward first! And see how the mental body feels about that for a change. Do you know what we're saying?

You have to analyze this and figure out which one is going first so that you can now stop it before it starts jumping ahead again and see which other aspect you'd like to bring forward. At that point, when you can be consciously "in control" of that, then you can bring them all forward at the same time because you are aware of what each of them is doing--do you see--because they're not all acting as one unit. Have we made any sense?

R: Mm-hm.

What would be your guess about which part of you jumps forward first?

R: Mental.

That's what we were seeing too. All right. So the mental body always gives the impression that if it is in command, then you're fine. It is the first body to want to be in control. And so it's saying, "Don't worry. As long as I'm first, you'll be making the right decision," but that creates a splitting or a separation. You can re-train your mental body. You can just say, "Get back there! Get back" (laughs) and then consciously choose to bring your emotional body forward, do you see? Or your third body, or whatever. So in an everyday situation, why doesn't your mental body trust your emotional body to take the lead?

R: Just even talking about it, I'm not sure what it would even look like to have my emotional body take the lead.

Well, it would feel like something.

R: What would it feel like? I mean the only sense I get is that I would feel something more joyful than having my emotional body dragged along in fear. (laughter) That's kind of what I feel like I'm doing . . .

Being dragged kicking and screaming . . . (laughter)

R: Yeah. So this is kind of a new concept to me.

We will leave it at that for the moment.

R: Okay.

We are introducing these now and our Jyoti is saying: "Oh well. So much for what we had planned at this point in the workshop; we'll just scramble our time later." And that's true. But it's as we said--"strike while the iron is hot" is your expression. While we are in the energy of these great opportunities, why say, "Oh, well. We'll come back to these tomorrow?" because the point of power is now. All right.

But in this case we will say: "We will leave it at that for now because you will be incubating these revelations." You will be processing them between now and tomorrow when we do the soul retrieval work one-on-one. And it will move you to a place where you will be more ready, where you will be participating more with your own process than otherwise, which would actually accelerate the process because when you get that Eureka, that Ah-ha feeling, the power is that it changes you forever.

You can get it mentally, but it will not have the same effect. The power of revelation is: "I got it in every one of my bodies all at the same time! We are in accord." The greatest changes then are possible. That's the difference between revelation and just understanding something intellectually. And so you understand that as great a tool as your mental body has become, it also has limitations.

You understand that your heart-spirit connection is what propels you forward in spiritual evolution, not metaphysical mental work. Then you may feel more confident about allowing your heart and your spirit to take over, instead of the mental body. And that choice will mean that you have set a spiritual goal, do you see? You've made a commitment to spiritual evolution. All right! We are going to close this part of our program, and move on to the next level of the heart axis mudra meditation.

Our Jyoti is saying, "Let's take about a five-minute break, grab those cookies." Her lips are getting dry. We need to have her drink more water here, and then we will start with the next part of our session. We thank you for your cooperation and we will be checking in with you later. We are Melora.

Continue to Part II (Exercises).

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